Tuesday 25 November 2014

There Are 3 Cs In Success


Yes I know literally there are only two. From my experience though whenever I ask the question, ‘What stops people doing what they are supposed to do?’ - it boils down to three ‘Cs’:

·  Clarity – they aren’t clear on what they are supposed to do or why


·  Competency – they don’t know how to do it. Even if you were to put a gun to their heads (not a management technique recommended by the way) they couldn’t do it

·  Commitment – they are not motivated to do it to their best abilities

So when you are faced with a task ask yourself if it meets these three criteria. This works for you and those you manage. The way you apply it to others is slightly different though.

I have often found that as managers, we fall down too easily on providing enough clarity. I sometimes get participants to play the game where one beats out the rhythm of a tune and the others have to guess. Rarely are they successful and yet the person beating the rhythm cannot understand. It’s because the ‘drummer’ has more information in their head! So when we delegate a task it’s too easy to think because we are clear others must be. The only way to find out if someone else is clear is to ask them how they are going to carry it out. They may for example assume they know if you simply ask them, ‘Are you clear on this?’

Once they are clear on the task it’s much easier to check if they then know how to do it and how to do it well. Again the only way to be sure is to ask them.

Finally we often assume that others’ motivations are the same as ours. This is sometimes true but it is certainly not safe to assume that it always is. I believe absolutely that you cannot motivate others directly. If you try you will only wear yourself out. You can only help them to ignite their own motivations.
So how do you find out what motivates them? It’s simple really – ask them! Ask something like ‘What would really motivate you on this task?’ Often by changing it a little, by for example adding some responsibility or aligning it to their values – it can make a huge difference.

So success is about these three ‘Cs’. It is also about getting used to asking yourself and especially others more questions about what will lead to success.

Kevin Parker
Read my book: Purple Monkeys! A Leader’s Practical Guide To Unleashing The Power Of Questions To Achieve Great Results’ available on Amazon and all good book shops

Wednesday 25 June 2014

Latest Reviews Of Purple Monkeys

4.0 out of 5 stars Good insightful and says what it does on the tin.

Enjoyable read, with a nice perspective to get you thinking about how, why and what you can do to obtain more by asking the right question and then listening.

5 Stars - Brilliantly instructive and a great read!



I have to admit that I've never been a fan of 'instructional manuals', depending instead on a combination of intuition and experience. This book has changed my view entirely. It sets out to demonstrate the power of asking questions - and not just any questions, but the right ones in particular circumstances. 

The author encourages us to consider how asking powerful questions can help to provide focus, to manage emotions, to build self-awareness, to challenge assumptions, to increase assertiveness and accelerate learning. And, of equal importance, how to develop the essential art of listening. 

He provides many examples, both in the text and as appendices such as 'The Best Powerful Questions List'. I began adopting this approach even before I had finished reading the book - with immediate positive results. And not just at work: I've found it can also be applied just as effectively to domestic situations. 

This book should be on every manager's desk - and those of local government officials and elected councillors. And (a very real bonus in this genre) it's a really enjoyable read!

Monday 23 June 2014

Why Don’t People Do What They Are Supposed To Do?

Being a leader is getting other people to do the things that maybe you did yourself before becoming the leader. You used to do what you’re now asking them to do, no problem. So when they don’t things or do them properly, you can easily start to label them as lazy, awkward, stroppy etc.

I work with the useful belief that most people come to work to do a good job. I’m sure there are a very small percentage of people who unfortunately suffer from mental issues, but I’m talking about relatively normal people here. If you believe that statement too, then what is it the stops people performing to their best or even at a minimum just doing what they are asked to do?

I believe it is all about the three ‘C’s of Clarity, Competence, and Commitment. Lets look at these in more detail

Maybe the reason that someone isn’t doing something is that they are not clear on what they are supposed to be doing and why. I remember the story of the girl at a fast food restaurant who, as soon as someone left their table, she was there clearing it up, wiping the table clean and rearranging the chairs. When asked why she was so diligent, she replied that people buy more when they eat in, rather than take away. She said they are more likely to eat in when tables are clean and available. Her job was to make sure tables were clean and available within 10 seconds of someone leaving. This led to more sales and she shared in the financial success of the restaurant. What could be clearer than that?

Remember it’s your job to make sure they have clarity. I have found that simply asking whether they are clear is not enough. People assume they are clear and know what they are supposed to do, or on the other hand are too embarrassed to say they don’t know. The only way to be certain is to check with them their understanding.

Secondly are they capable of doing what they asked them to do. Do they have the competence? In other word if I held a gun at their head, they would still not be able to do what I had asked. How do you find out? The simplest and easiest way is to ask them how they would go about what you have asked them to do. If they can’t tell you they need training, information or support. Now you might feel it seems a little condescending to ask someone this. It’s better though to risk this, than someone doing it wrongly or not at all, and then needing to have a more difficult conversation. You can always dress it up by saying something like ‘I just wanted to check how you might go about this’

Finally it might be because they may not be motivated to do what you ask or they may not feel confident enough to do it. The combination of confidence of motivation is often called commitment. (It also makes it another ‘C’ too!). Motivation is a complicated thing and it varies significantly between different people. What motivates me might not motivate you. One thing’s for certain money is rarely a motivator - just look at the research if you don’t believe me

So how do you find out what might motivate someone? Well the simple answer is to ask them. Something like, ‘What would make this task motivating for you?’ It’s not complicated but just don’t assume they are motivated because you are.

I find the three ‘C’s a great way to remember what ensure someone can and will do what they have been asked to do. Please feel free to share this with others and I would be delighted to hear examples of excuses people give for not doing something.

The best one I have come across so far was ‘ I didn’t know hen you asked me to do that that you were really serious’

Kevin Parker


Thursday 15 May 2014

Three Dumb Habits That Destroy The Power Of Questions

Becoming better at asking more powerful questions will undoubtedly increase your influence and effectiveness by getting the recipients to think through things for themselves. However we often though shoot ourselves in the foot by:

·       The way we ask them
·       Not giving the other person time to answer
·       Not listening attentively enough to the response we get.

There are many ways to improve the way you ask questions and I have written about them in my book ‘Purple Monkeys! A Practical Leaders Guide To Unleashing The Power Of Questions To Deliver Great Results.’ However addressing the three issues above to begin with, will make a huge difference to your effectiveness

Firstly open questions. It’s obvious I know, but closed questions close a conversation down, and open ones open them up. This works with the exception of teenagers and politicians. Teenagers respond to open questions with one word answers, and politicians respond to closed questions saying it's not as simple or yes or no - let me explain.

I often run the following simple exercise on my training courses. I say to participants that I want to go on holiday and you are all travel agents. So ask me questions to find out what I want so that you can propose a package that I will want. The questions start coming in such as, ‘Do you like beach holidays?’ or ‘Are you going alone or with family?’ or ‘Do you want an all inclusive deal?’ These are all closed questions and will result in me giving little information away.

This always happens, which suggests to me that this is the habit that we all get into. And how helpful is it? It doesn’t save time, it doesn’t give us much information and it doesn’t get the recipient to do much thinking. Asking more open questions is one of the simplest things you can do to get other people talking, thinking and taking more responsibility. A study of primary school teachers showed they asked closed questions 58% of their time, and that by changing this ratio they would make a significant difference in their pupils’ engagement.

My (open) question to you is, ‘What’s would happen if you upped your ratio?’
Secondly even if we start asking more open questions the danger is we spoil their impact by not giving the recipient time to think and respond properly.

In the same study of teachers, they also discovered that the ‘wait-time’ periods of undisturbed silence after a question rarely lasted more than 1.5 seconds in normal classroom discussion, and the typical length was between 0.7 and 1.4 seconds.  They discovered that, if teachers simply increased ‘wait-times’ to three or more seconds, then there were benefits to be gained for both teacher and pupils. These included:

·       The length of recipient responses increases 400 to 800 percent.
·       Student achievement increases significantly.
·       Student confidence increases and they ask more questions.

Simply by increasing the gap at the end of the question it increases their effectiveness substantially!

This seems to be a well-documented finding in education but does not seem to be so well known in the business world. So why don’t we do this? As the questioner we often feel that the gap at the end of a question is like an eternity. As a result there is a huge temptation to start talking to fill in the space. The person on the receiving end has a very different perception. Their mind is busy considering the answer and they notice the waiting time much less.

I have developed the habit of counting five seconds in my head after asking a question. It works and I wonder how much it would improve your effectiveness.

What would happen if you adopted a similar habit?

Finally if you ask questions you had better be prepared to listen. Listening shows enormous respect to other people. A basic need of all human beings is to have our existence and importance recognised. When this need is not met we are likely to act in all sorts of dysfunctional and unhelpful ways.

My Dad died a few years ago. He had always been active in the local community and over 100 people attended his funeral. I gave the eulogy and after the service many people came up to me and shared their memories of him. The common theme of virtually all of them was that he had time for people. He spent the time to listen to them. Of all the things he did, they remembered that the most!

The Chinese symbol for listening is made up of a number of characters which summarise to me what good listening is all about:

·       The character for EYES
·       The character for ATTENTION
·       The character for OPEN HEART
·       The character for EARS
The benefit of listening are that you show respect but I have found that when I am listening in this way the next question I need to ask becomes obvious. As a colleague of mine says, ‘The last answer becomes the mother of the next question.’

How much attention do you pay when listening?


Notice what happens when you do!